Scene 1: Ali’s Barber Shop, Baghdad ― in which three strange customers come in and tell Ali their tale
(The stage is in darkness as the Narrator begins to set the scene.)
NARRATOR Long, long ago in the ancient city of Baghdad. In the even more ancient empire of Persia, there lived, in the company of his domineering wife and somewhat dim son, a man called Ali. Now Ali and his family were simple law abiding folk just like the majority of Baghdadians. (Frowns and ponders for a moment.) Ali himself was a simple man, a barber by trade. But trade was in regression, Baghdad was in recession, beards were in fashion so Ali and his family lived on rations. (Having exhausted himself through the last sentence the Narrator takes a moment to calm himself.) Phew! Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. Ali, the barber. (At this point the lights come up on stage to reveal a barber shop and Ali walks on sweeping the floor.) And here is our hero, sweeping the floor, as if he'd been flooded with customers. Still, he does take pride in his little boutique bless. Now, on with the story. Ali, as I said was a barber. Now the thing about Barbers is that they meet all sorts of people and pick up all sorts of snippets of information. Ali was no different. Although in Ali's case a little bit of knowledge was definitely a dangerous thing! Anyway, when he had customers, he had a natural way of getting them to talk. So, one day oh, it will have to wait. It seems Ali has some customers...
(Into Ali's shop walk three very well dressed gentlemen but looking shabby and dusty from travelling from afar. Customer 1 looks particularly shabby and has a bandage on his head and long hair underneath. Customer 2 has dreadlocks and Customer 3 has a particularly long beard. Customers 2 and 3 each carry an ornate box.)
CUSTOMER 1 Good morning boy. Get your master, we require some grooming.
CUSTOMER 2 Yes. My locks require urgent attention.
CUSTOMER 3 A shampoo and set for my beard. It's full of dust and stuff. (Pulls a chicken from out of his beard and throws it offstage.)
CUSTOMER 1 Well, boy. What are waiting for? Get your master here pronto. We're desperate.
CUSTOMER 2 Speak for yourself dear. (Turning to Customer 3.) Anything edible in there by any chance?
CUSTOMER 3 Nothing more so than might be lurking in that Gordian knot on your head!
CUSTOMER 1 Oh plug it you two. Now boy, do we get some service here or do we take our business elsewhere.
ALI I am the proprietor of this establishment sir. I can see that you are not from these parts and are much travelled. From the looks of your beards, you must have been on the road a long time since the last city. I suspect that some misfortune has occurred during your travels. Would you like me to call the constable?
CUSTOMER 1 You are an observant and wise man. There is no need for a constable. What happened, happened. We shall find the men that accosted me and grind their bones to dust. In the meantime, we need a shave. Is that too much to ask?
(C) Simon Paul, 2010
